Hi everyone. I've been meaning to write an update here for a little while now, so here it is.
Firstly, I'm not completely offline; I know I've been a bit inactive in terms of uploads recently and I'm not going to make an excuse for it like I usually do: I've let my art standards slip a bit more than I'd have liked
, and that's made me question my own trustworthiness over the past few months. I have actually been online and accepting deviations into the groups I contribute to, as well as reading your comments on my images – thank you so much for those – but I've been staying quiet; observing, watching, listening.
Anyhow, I want to give all my watchers an update on my projects. You probably started watching me because of these structured uploads as opposed to my random one-offs (hey, remember that novella?) so, let's start from the top.
I understand I've tarnished Reboot a bit, but the good news is that I've replaced all the traced lines with my own lines now. They're back online now, even though I feel like the trust and determination for these pages has gone. Reboot is also suffering from a serious case of “actually I don't know where I'm going with this” syndrome. I had some ideas when I started, but none of them really work well, all things considered. I've spoken to my friend (who's a “humour writer” and posts much more interesting stuff than I do on his blog
) who advises me that “all great stories have some kind of conflict within them” – conflict
not necessarily meaning war
in this sense, just something with opposing viewpoints. That said, I've never been good at stories, so I don't know why I thought this would be any better
If Reboot has taught me one thing, though, it's how to make art for myself
, instead of pandering to and catering for a perceived audience. Reboot was made solely for me and although I tried to make it to a deadline, it's the first real piece of art I've done where I haven't swayed to other people's expectations of the way it should be done. Sure, it's boring as *boop* to read, but it's been insanely fun to draw and I didn't think it was possible for me to enjoy something like that any more. So that's interesting.
I'm going to put a lot of thought into what to do with Reboot over the next week and see what I can draw up. If it's a blank, I might put it on hold until I can think of a direction for it to go in. “Let's copy Friends™
but with less characters” isn't good enough right now. I really want to learn some techniques for i.e. drawing anime hair properly before I do anything else, and I might can Reboot in favour of a more interesting storyline (hey, remember that novella?
Wait what, this again!?)
Figure photos/“The Secret Life of Toys”
Ah, I assume this ongoing series of photos (which are getting more-and-more generic) is one of the reasons why you're watching me. That said, I shouldn't make assumptions.
Don't want tea?
I'm still taking photos for this, but my well of creativity has gone dry recently since I moved into the room in my colleague's flat this time last year. To be honest, I haven't really had much of a chance to find a good “figure photography place” – my room is just too small, and the few shots I upload usually involve balancing my camera on my tripod off the edge of my bed to take a snap of the tiny figure on the desk (that takes up the rest of the space in my room). The problem I have right now is the minimum usable distance from the end of my camera lens to the front of my figure is still too much for the cramped space I'm in – even my “macro” lens needs about a half a meter to work effectively. I've saved up for a super short 50mm lens to see if I can coax some funky shots out of my small room. Otherwise, I can at least branch off into fuzzy portrait photography.
You're probably asking why I've brought up something that's over two years old here. Fact of the matter is that I never finished this. I met someone amazing and just let the project go, but now I'm on my own again I keep thinking about how I was so close to the end and just stopped. It wouldn't be a 365 project if I picked it up again now, so I think I'll just put all the remaining efforts into trying to improve the two projects I've already mentioned in this journal. It was fun while it lasted, but we've all come a long way since the 13th of December, 2012. My Asuza Nendoroid is still around; just shying away from the limelight right now. I might get her out for a few photos in the future, though.
If you're interested in my other, non-art projects which I used to mention randomly on old journal posts (which I've deleted because they're not relevant any more) you can always check out my portfolio
. It's the first stop for all new stuff I announce and I've just put a bunch of time into stabilising it and making it work and look better.
Back in February/March I mentioned some work stuff that was bringing me down
, and I can now say that the ordeal is now over for me at least. I fought “tooth and nail” to keep my job and after a month of what seemed to be constant demotivation from the upper management, I got called into a meeting with the centre manager and HR head and was told, very bluntly, that I had been fortunate enough to keep my job because of “the evidence [I]'d provided over the month and the way [I] fit into the team so well”
. That said, some of my closest colleagues left and my office currently has an atmosphere of fear which is noticeable when you step in there. I also know I'm on a shortlist if this happens again, so I've been spending a lot (too much time) there improving everything I do and it's really starting to pay off now with the feedback that's coming in from our product. I'm happy at the moment, but I'm worried it won't last.
Anyway. I'm getting a bit long and chatty here. I'm going to try and become more active again over the next few months – back to normal service, in a way Things are not explained by the past. They're explained by what happens now.
Stay positive, folks